I didn't know what to title this post. Unexpected and shocked is how I felt when I talk to my Dr. after my ultrasound yesterday.
My Dr. came in and apologized because they were running so late that day. (running so late in fact that it was and hr past closing time by that point) So you can imagine my unexpected shock when she begins to tell me that on the ultra sound of my baby girls brain its measuring a little bit bigger on one side than the other.
My Dr. was very good with talking to me about it, and didn't want me to worry too much. Because in her opinion it'll probably be OK. She says she has seen this happen often. Sometimes it was just the way the ultra sound was done. Like if the Doppler was slightly tilted when she took the pic instead of "straight" it could make the image look that way, or if the baby had moved a bit when she took the pic could cause the same thing. Also she said- allot of times one side will be bigger than the other but will even out by birth.
She is sending me to USA hospital in Alabama for a high risk Ultra sound. Its not far from my Dr's office. And they will be able to see more because their US equipment is much better. She also told me that even if everything looked good she's never known them not to at least see a person 1 or 2 times after that just to follow up on how they're doing and how things look. She said she knows that is hard not to worry because she's a mother and understands. That she hates to worry anyone if it is unnecessary. But it would be deceitful of course to just give me another ultra sound in her office and not tell me why.
During all of that I'm trying to process and remember what she is telling me. Through my shock Trying to wrap my head around everything. So after I checked out, and was in the car with my mama (she came with us to watch dassah and watched the ultra sound since dh had to work ) I tried to find the words to tell her what had just happen. My voice cracked a bit of course because of strongly trying to control my emotions. I did manage to calm my nerves a bit and began to tell her what my Dr. had told me. She of course says not to over stress and worry and that we would all Pray about it.
I told dh that night. I kept wanting to start telling him but would feel myself almost burst into tears every time I was about to from being so tense about it. Then would try to compose my self again and again. It didn't take long for him to notice something was wrong with me and asked what was wrong. The tears came, and him being the comforter that he is.. listened to everything while rubbing my back. And after I was through telling him all I knew. He tells me not to stress and worry too much and that we'll Pray about it, and to just have Faith that everything will be OK with the baby. I don't know what I would do with out him.
Today I called and checked in with my Dr's office and left a message to touch base and MAKE SURE that they were on the ball about getting me an appt at USA. A nurse called me back and was very nice to me and reassured me that they are in the process of that and are waiting to here back from them. She said they had to send them allot of info, and that she'll call them tomorrow morning and I should have an Appt date by tomorrow. Which will be good.
It's good that my Dr. thinks this maybe nothing, BUT as a Parent you NEVER want to hear that the slightest thing could be wrong with your baby/child. I'm sure you all understand.
So as of today I have done really well no major break downs . Trying my best not to let worry and fear set in (with God's help). And Praying and asking the Lord through out my day to give us peace of mind and heart... Asking that and putting my Faith in Him that everything will be OK and that He is in control. Please continue to keep our family and our sweet baby girl in your Prayers. That's the BEST thing anyone could do for us.
I'm sorry this was so long. I didn't even know how I was going to begin this post. Only a few select people know about this in my family that I've told and they are Praying to. I do not want to tell anyone else right now.. and deal with questions that I don't have the answers to, and just don't want to talk to them about it. And right now we really don't know one way or the other if there is an issue.
I'm a very Private person, and all I need when dealing with somethings are God, my husband, my mama, sister, 1 aunt, and a grandma that will Pray about it. I am blessed with amazing support and encouragement through all these people. Thinking about this makes me want to cry thankful happy tears.
Thanks for listening and just being here. Y'all will never know just how much it means or helps. I'm going to bed now and hoping for a good nights sleep.