Hello all hope you are doing well. As for me I'm doing pretty good considering all that I've been through.lol AF showed up Yesterday... That was not a surprise.. Because like I have explained before.. We are not really candidates for IUI. WE NEED IVF with ICSI or quite simply.. a Miracle!!!
I called my IVF Nurse.. And said- I wanted to Cancel my pregnancy test on Thursday... Yep I didn't make it to my beta test last time either after the IUI. BUT I rather have it that way if I'm not pregnant. I don't want someone calling me, and telling me I'm not pregnant you know?? it's just easier that way for me:) Maybe the progesterone suppositories just don't work well for me?? Who Knows?? Well at least I know I'll be doing the Progesterone SHOTS when I do actually make it to IVF retrieval and transfer one day...SIGH.
Well... just like I told y'all before... I did schedule another IVF/ICSI..ASAP!!! My retrieval is scheduled for the week of September 14th. This will be our 3rd "Attempt" at IVF.... SO for we have been "canceled twice" due to me not responding enough to the meds... and not having enough mature follies... ALL I NEED IS 4 mature follies for my DR. to do a retrieval... I'm not asking for much... just 4 to 8 Mature Follies... Oh I make lotz of follies always.. thanks to "PCOS" BUT most of the time they never mature. Thank you messed up hormones.lol HEY.. you got to laugh about it sometimes.. just to keep going AT LEAST.
I don't know what to expect this time around with IVF and all. Will I finally respond enough?? I just don't have the answers and never will. IF I think logically... it seems that YES eventually they'll get my meds right and I'll respond. BUT what if for some crazy reason I don't ever respond enough??? HOW many times am I willing to "ATTEMPT IVF" and then possibly get canceled from not responding??? Well My answer Right now is 6 to 7 times all together... Right now I'm at my 3rd attempt... SO that gives them plenty of time to figure this out.
Now.... "When and If" I DO respond to the meds... I'll do 3 IVF or Frozen transfers.. depending on whether or not I have any to embryos to freeze... seeing how My body so far just don't want to make alot of mature follies. BUT.. We'd do more than 3 frozen transfers depending on if we had any left.. YES we would continue to come back until all were used and got a chance at life. THATS WHY we have a limit of working with only 6 to 8 embryos. And the fact that we're totally against discarding embryos unless their NOT GROWING/DEAD... that's plainly put enough I guess.
My pour husband.... I have good days and bad days. ANd the bad days are not pretty. OH!!! but I can be really mean and have such bad mood swings. I HATE THAT!!! It just makes me feel worse..ugh!! He's wonderful with dealing with all this most of the time though. In fact yesterday He told me that YES he agreed that 6 attempts of IVF would be allot...BUT he'd keep trying as long as I wanted. AND he also said that if for some reason that is not Gods plan for us to have biological children.. That was Fine too... He Said that He Can Love an adoptive Child as his own and no less than a biological one.. and that he thinks we both would be great and Loving adoptive parents. I for one can count myself blessed that I have a husband so accepting of adoption because I've seen allot of cases where the wife felt she could BUT the husband didn't want too or wasn't sure. HE is such a GOOD MAN I TELL YOU!!! I'm SO in LOVE:) SO we both are fine with adoption if we do decided to adopt one day. I have no doubt that we could Love an adoptive child as our own. The only thing that scares me is the PROCESS OF ADOPTION!!! But if you know me well enough by now... you know that I won't give up on something if its my dream;)
YES... I have been doing lots of thinking about the future and decisions... Sorry for the INFO over load.lol
I hope you are all doing well... I've seen a few more BFP's:) so huge congrats to all of those out there!!! I'm truly happy for you!!!